Suicide, it’s a selfish thing. Suicide is selfish, it’s something that often happens when a person feels hopeless and helpless. I remember someone who told me that. It was actually after I just had been released from inpatient for a suicide attempt. Those two words always stuck with me: hopeless and helpless. What on Earth could possibly have been so bad that I felt so hopeless, and then why didn’t I see the people in my life who would have gladly given up everything to help lift me up. The answer? There isn’t one. My depression clouded my judgement so much that I wasn’t able to see the people around me who wanted to help. It’s a hard thing to understand. That’s why I am strongly against guilt tripping people who are suicidal. It doesn’t help at all, in fact it often hurts. Still it’s important to remember the people left behind. There’s two sides to the suicide coin. There is the person who attempts and the people who are left behind. I can personally tell you that the people left behind are forever changed. There was a girl in my community who committed suicide, her name doesn’t matter. Even though I didn’t know her, I knew many of her best friends. When I heard this wonderful girl killed herself, I literally cried for an hour. Looking at the people around her made me want to make a change in the world. That was a moment that inspired me.

Suicide is a hard thing to talk about, and I personally have a ton to say. As a survivor of not one, two, even three attempts, (somewhere in the neighborhood of 17), I always will tell everyone and anyone out there that there IS help to be had. You are not alone, you are not helpless, and I will not rest until this IS NOT the end of your story.

My name is Michael, and that’s a small piece of a large story that has made me who I am. I’m always here to talk for anyone in need. Anyone.

Michael

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